Fulfillment: Why Life Coaching Works for the Gifted, the Sequel
fulfillment, gifted, life coaching, resonance, values Add commentsIn my last post, I described one reason why I coach gifted people and parents of gifted children (which, let’s face it, are generally gifted people themselves. And yes, moms, that does include you; your children aren’t just gifted because of their fathers. If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard that one…Anyways, I’m now going to simplify my life and your reading by referring to gifted people and parents of gifted children as “gifted people.” Now, back to our not-so-regularly-scheduled blog post). It’s a word called entelechy, which is the drive to self-actualize, and you can read here how this characteristic of gifted people makes them prime coaching clients.
Closely related to entelechy is another reason life coaching works well for gifted people: fulfillment. Fulfillment is one of three life coaching principles. It involves discovering one’s values, which in coaching lingo means that which makes you uniquely you. When we live according to our values, we feel resonance, that feeling that all is right with the world. For example, if we value authenticity, we’ll feel alive when we’re in relationships and circumstances that allow us to be our full selves and to speak our truth. Even when we’re in difficult situations, we’ll feel energized if we’re expressing our values in them.
On the flip side, when we don’t live in line with our values, we feel dissonance. Energy drains from us, and we don’t feel fulfilled. We might even begin to feel dead inside. For example, if we value authenticity, but we’re in an intimate relationship, work setting, or social situation where we feel the need to hide parts of ourselves, we feel less alive.
Fulfillment is closely related to entelechy. Entelechy is the drive to self-actualize, and fulfillment is a vehicle for getting there.
Because fulfillment is a basic principle of life coaching, gifted people naturally make wonderful coaching clients. Gifted people have strong inner compasses full of values. They often wish to use their gifts for the betterment of the world. They possess a strong sense of justice and morality. They are empathetic. They also frequently hold values of curiosity, deep connection with others like them, wacky humor, creativity, challenge, playfulness, and solitude, among others. (You can look at My Ginormous List of Gifted Grownup Traits to find more values gifted people hold.)
Gifted people adhere to their values very strongly (do we do anything halfway?). In fact, we frequently cannot not live our values! Sometimes we do this unconsciously. We don’t know what our values are, yet we feel compelled to speak and behave in certain ways. Life coaching can help gifted people become conscious of their unique set of values and find ways to live them out in all areas of their lives: family, friendships, work, fun and recreation, and health, among others. By exploring what makes them come alive, a process that naturally brings most gifted people resonance, gifted people can create lives that bring them energy and allow them to make their unique contribution to the world.
If you’re interested in learning more about this, please contact me, and inquire about my complimentary thirty-minute session for potential clients. I’d love to help you explore your own set of values and find fulfillment in every area of your life!
©2010 Lisa Lauffer
March 26th, 2010 at 9:05 am
I have never heard the word “entelechy” but I just love it! The woman who taught the gifted program at our grade school (she now coordinates) is a friend of mine and I’m going to send her the link to this post. I know she’ll find it interesting. I like your list, too, and I’m going to send her that as well. She frequently discusses the isolation some kids feel (not all, but some) and she sure did her best to mitigate that when she had my kids. She put me on to this trilogy “Imperfectly Ordinary,” which is at its core the examined life of an adult, through the eyes of an unacknowledged gifted child. He’s grown up to be unhappy without understanding how he got that way. The second book, “I Promised You Daisies,” covers life in the late ’60s — when they were NOT doing the ‘ate ’60s stuff! — in and around Boston. Very engaging and readable — and the trilogy is a must-read for anyone who even suspects they might be part of the life of a gifted child. He even has resources on his web site.